I. A Cop’s Advice
- Advice from me on what to do and what not to
do if/when you are pulled over. If you don't
like the advice I give feel free to go somewhere
else and get advice there.
A. Alarms
- Got an alarm system in your house or
business? Good for you, skippy.
B. Calling 911
- Don't know what 911 is for? Put down
the Rubik's Cube you've been working on
since 1982 and read this page.
C. DTLA
- Some driving advice for the
learning-disabled.
D. Illegal
Parking
- Yes, it is still illegal for you to park
in the fire lane even if you are only going
to "run in and run out" of the store.
E. Influence
- Why I think it's a bad idea to give
special favors to one segment of the
population.
F. Not
Pulling Over
- See that police car in your rearview
mirror? Get the hell out of the way!
G. Seat Belts
- If you don't routinely wear your seat belt
you are an idiot.
H. Stupid Calls
- Examples of things that made me want to
ask, "You called the police for this?"
II. Baseball
- Musings on my favorite game.
A.
Artificial Turf
- A brief diatribe on turf as well as the
designated hitter. Both suck.
B. Base
Stealing
- An often misused strategy.
C. Batting
Order
- Rarely does the batting order of a team
make any sense when put into the proper
context.
D. Closers
- How idiot managers are pricing their
bullpens off their teams and out of
baseball.
E. OPS
- A better way of determining how skilled a
hitter is.
F. Records
- Context, context, context.
G. Salaries
- Do I think they are too high, too low, or
just about right? Hmmm...
III. Batman
- I am really, really into the stories of the Dark
Knight. Really.
IV. Biography
- The thirty-second version of my A&E special which
has yet to air.
V. Chess
- For the first fifteen years of my life I assumed I
sucked at chess, because the only person I ever
played was my father. He is terrific at chess
and beat me every single time.
A. History
of Chess
- After all the research that went into this
page I hope at least one person actually
reads it.
B. The
Immortal Game
- Get a board and run through the moves.
They are truly impressive.
VI. Conspiracy Theories
- They are out there. No, this doesn't mean
I'm crazy.
A. Project
Bluebook
- All about Area 51 and aliens. No,
this doesn't mean I'm crazy.
B. The JFK
Assassination
- Oswald did not shoot Kennedy. Yes,
really. No, this doesn't mean I'm
crazy.
C. The Truth
About Marijuana
- It's only illegal because a rich white guy
wanted to get richer. Yes, really.
No, this doesn't mean I'm crazy.
D. MK-Ultra
- True story about how the CIA researched
mind-controlling drugs. No, I'm not
crazy.
E. Project
Paperclip
- Nazi scientists worked on the American
space program. Yes, really. Me =
not crazy.
F. The Shroud
of Turin - This is not the burial
cloth of Jesus. Honest. No, I'm
not crazy.
VII. FAQ
- I get lots of emails. Hopefully this will
intercept a few.
VIII. Index (Home Page)
- You only get one chance to make a first
impression. If you didn't like the one my home
page left on you, I'm sure you'll get over it.
IX. Legal Stuff
- Probably an exercise in futility. Lawsuits
have become the national pastime.
X. Links Page
- Only check these out after you've looked at and
appreciated every single page in my site.
Hello? Still reading?
XI. Philosophy
- In case you were looking for more of my thoughts.
XII. Police Firearms
Training
- Help is available here for overwhelmed police
firearms instructors.
XIII. Rants
- Thank you, Dennis Miller, for the title.
XIV. Reconstruction
- I love accident reconstruction. Yes, really.
No, I'm not kidding.
XV. Search This Site
- A quick way to find the most annoying words.
XVI. Table of
Contents
- You are here. Stop looking around you - I
meant... oh, nevermind.
XVII. Urban Legends
- A couple of brief examples.
